20 Funny Golf Sayings and Inspirational Golf Quotes

Here is a collection of 20 golf quotes – some are inspirational and others are golf sayings that will hopefully bring a smile to your face. Enjoy.

“Mistakes are part of the game. It’s how well you recover from them, that’s the mark of a great player.” – Alice Cooper

“The most important shot in golf is the next one.” – Ben Hogan

“I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.” – Gerald R. Ford

“The only sure rule in golf is he who has the fastest cart never has to play the bad lie.” – Mickey Mantle

“To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.” – P.G. Wodehouse

“As you walk down the fairway of life, you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round.” – Ben Hogan

“I started watching golf for the first time yesterday. I`m really worried about myself. I was actually enjoying it.” – Ewan McGregor

“If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt.” – Dean Martin

“Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.” – Tiger Woods

“Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a 7 to do that.” – Jim Murray

“I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone’s game: It’s called an eraser.” – Arnold Palmer

“If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play at it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.” – Bob Hope

“I call upon all nations to do everything they can to stop these terrorist killers. Thank you. Now watch this drive.” – George W. Bush

“Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it’s open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.” – Dave Barry

“Golf… is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.” – P.G. Wodehouse

“I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.” – G.K. Chesterton

“Stay true to yourself and listen to your inner voice. It will lead you to your dream.” – James Ross

“It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. It took one afternoon on the golf course.” – Hank Aaron

“Golf is a puzzle without an answer. I’ve played the game for 50 years and I still haven’t the slightest idea of how to play.” – Gary Player

“Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.” – Jack Benny

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11 Comments

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  5. David gee says: | Reply

    Have you heard of a golf phrase “cutting the grumble” and have any idea what it means…i was testing my juniors in golf and my golf idol gave me this to nut out

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